Whenever I post my pictures with my brother(which is quite often and they’re usually supported by cheesy captions), my friends tell me they could never have a relationship like ours. In fact, a lot of people have told us this.
Let me tell you, up until we were kids, we couldn’t see eye to eye. As we grew up, our bond kept growing stronger till it became impenetrable. This didn’t happen overnight. We made conscious efforts towards this(with a lot of guidance from Dad).
So, if you wish you’d have such an amazing bond with your sibling too, here are 7 ways that will surely yield results:-
1: Have A Heart To Heart
This HAS to be the first step. It is imperative that you know if you’ll are on the same page. A lot of times, people assume things about each other and don’t bother clarifying because they feel their assumptions are right. But that usually is not the case. Having a heart to heart will not only mean you’re clearing any hidden hurt from the past, it will also make you realise where to be careful in the future. Speaking about everything you and your sibling are holding in, will make it easier to let go. Repeat this from time to time.
2: Acknowledge Your Differences
This is a step that is essential for any relationship to survive. My brother and I are both extremely strong personalities and sometimes we do come head-on, but we’re both aware of who the other person is and that makes it easier to handle a situation. For example, We’re both workaholics. But where he likes to work under a serious mood all the time, I need my music. Where he prefers delegating, I end up taking more on my plate than I should be handling. But we are well aware of our differences and that helps us understand each other better.
3: Bond Over The Similarities
It is impossible that you would have zero similarities with your sibling. My brother and I bond over a lot of mutual likings- cars, fine living, work and each other. By some weird luck, if you don’t have any similarities, develop them like I did with this one- my brother loves watching WWE. Years ago(when I was in Junior College) I used to cringe at the sight of violence, but I started watching this with him and we’d then have long discussions over the matches. It has been years, but we still wake up early every year to watch Wrestlemania together.
I’m sure you’ve heard of this and think this is pretty self-explanatory. But this is easier said than done. Everyone is understanding up until the point you’re actually in need. You know your sibling loves you. That means, just like I’m sure your intent is, their intent too is of your best interest when they give you an advice you don’t like or state an opinion that’s hard to digest. Under these circumstances, you must consider their intent before drawing up conclusions.
Again, this is easier said than done. We’ve established that you both have pure intentions towards each other. But, these can be the cause of meddling too. You have to trust your sibling enough to make their decisions and learn from them(unless they’re considering murder, of course). Space is essential for growth. Hence, trust your sibling, give them the space they deserve and need and watch your relationship flourish.
6: Spend Quality Time
The most difficult thing to do today is to keep your phone away. Especially when you’re in your comfort zone with someone as special as your sibling. But, because your sibling is so special, doesn’t he/she deserve more attention? Set a side a couple of hours each week and spend time together. Joke about things, talk about your dreams and discuss real-life situations. Trust me, nothing connects anyone better than a genuine conversation. (Throw in a few hugs. I tend to hug him till he gets frustrated)
7: Value Them- And Show It
It is truly said that the ones closest to us are often taken for-granted. Which is the worst thing to do. Sure, I assume (and rightly so) that he’s going to be there for me through my highs and lows. But, I make it a point for him and everyone I love to know how much they mean to me on a regular basis. I like writing, so I express through words and sometimes letters. He’s not one to say it, but he expresses it through gestures. When he comes to pick me up, the car often has balloons (oh, how I love them!) inside. Establish a way, but let them know how much they mean to you on the regular.
At the end though, it always boils down to how badly you want it and how much you’re willing to work for it because just step 1 could take you weeks depending on where you’ll stand at the time of beginning.
Do let me know if you find this helpful and if you have a sibling relation that’s as special as mine, I would love to hear all about it!!
Until next time, xoxo.